I was hoping tonight I could make up for it. But, no! I am exercising 10 or 15 minutes at a time, and then taking 1/2 hour to get my breath before I can think about it again.
Tonight however, I will not pig out. I am going to give it my all to exercise tonight, even if in small amounts of time.
I went to see my Pulmonologist this afternoon. My oxygen level was 94 and that was on 5 LPM (liters per minute), my blood pressure slightly elevated and I had no temp. He came in and we talked a few minutes. I told him how heavy my chest felt, and how hard it was to feel "satisfied" with a breath... he said there is nothing he could do. He did ask me if I had heard from Seattle - University of Washington ... I told him the FEV levels they gave me as criteria for surgical procedures... LVRS or TRANSPLANT ... he was disgusted. He said that is leaving a patient sitting in a chair hooked up to O2, unable to move around because their O2 saturation is so bad.
He then showed me my latest CT scans of my lungs. Showed me the damage in the upper lobes and more so in the right one. And then as to what I can do now to feel better... he said go home and take it easy. He didn't want to give me any more steroids because they are so harmful to other organs.
Welcome to life with Emphysema. I almost wanted to cry just out of frustration. O.k. So... this is life from now on huh? No more meds will ease anything. No higher level of O2 at the moment. Nada. Just get used to having these periods of exacerbation's.
So here I sit. Now I know when I push myself too hard, or when the air quality is bad and I venture out in it, or when I get a cold or flu... this is how it will be. Any worse... and it is hospitalization and I.V.'s ..
He did tell me Thank You SO much for the holiday goodie basket I left for him and his staff. He especially liked my ginger snap cookies. He said his mother-in-law used to make them just like that and she has passed and his wife doesn't know the recipe.
I will bake him a batch and copy the recipe in a Valentines card and drop it off for him.
3 comments:
That is a lovely gesture Kellie I am sure he will appreciate it.
It is a pity that the medics cannot agree between themselves what is acceptable and what isn't. There seems to be a very fine window as to whether you are fit for surgery.
There is some doubt with me as to whether I am too weak so we are at opposite ends to one another.
Hang in there babe, try not to be too hard on yourself. When you are sick you have to lie back and take it easy. Get better first and then have another go then.
xx
From my perspective(following your blog for this past year) - you're pushing yourself REAL HARD at the moment. It's like you've gone from one extreme to another in this year's journey. From depression to being in the ring with four boxing gloves on each hand. lol Perhaps there's a happy medium that can be attained? I'm like you in the sense that once I make up my mind to do something I'm at 150% full steam ahead get out of my way! But I've found (more than once) that that's not always the wisest of choices. Temperance is not one of my strong suits and I keep having to learn that lesson again and again. If we push too hard, we can set ourselves back. ...passing thoughts...
Kellie, no wonder you did a little "emotional eating" last night...my heart goes out to you...I agree with Giulia...I remember my mom (God Bless Her!) she had a bad back for half her life and when she would start an exercise program, she would go "full-out", injure herself, and then have to stop...if she had just been "moderate" and done a little walking every day, it would have been so much better for her..."Moderation" is not in my genes, but I'm SO glad for all the other "things" I inherited from my mother--like tenacity and strength. But I also learned from her experiences to be "easy on myself", to not "overdo", not my "natural" temperament, but it is working, and I'm so much happier with myself...not easy, but simple :) Hugs, Savannah
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